TACKLING A TOUGH CONVERSATION: A COM-TEXT

Advocacy:  After breaking the news/update to the person, you have to let the client/partner EXPRESS, his anger, his concern, his worry over the situation. Develop an attitude of curiosity and analysis. Play out as if you aren’t much aware of the client side, and try to study the opponent/partner side and his perspective as much as possible. Allow your partner to finish. Avoid interruption, admittance of facts is acceptable. If you give attention to what the other person is saying, there are better chances to plausibly address the right issues and the conversation can end up on a better note. Ensure that your behaviour reinforces your speech. Don’t be impatient, you’ll get your turn.  
Breathe: The more calm and focussed you are, the easier it is to handle difficult conversations. Practice mindful breathing by taking short-intervals throughout the day. A number of well known companies like Apple, Google, Deutsche Bank etc. have implemented mindfulness programs for its employees to help build refocus and balance of mind. According to Dr. Weil "Practicing regular, mindful breathing can be calming and energizing and can even help with stress-related health problems ranging from panic attack to digestive disorders.”  This technique allows to handle complicated situations like, for instance if your co-worker comes to discuss an issue that might lead to a tough talk, excuse yourself for a small break (a tea/coffee break), think over it calmly, and get back with a composed mind. Decelerating the pace before responding to the other person develops the likelihood to find and use the right words” and tends to “pacify negative emotion”
Compassionate: Be considerate; be compassionate. Hard conversations often lead to strained working relationships, which can be distressing. It’s therefore wise to take an empathetic viewpoint at sensitive topics. It’s not a cake-walk, but one can put efforts to deliver a difficult talk in a courageous and honest way. What starts as an infuriation, can turn to anger and, in extreme cases, can accelerate to rage. This can be prevented by being considerate of preserving the individual's dignity—and treating them with regard—even if there is difference of opinion.  One should also not OVERDO by emoting or sympathising the situation.  
Direct: By this stage you’re ready to develop solutions. Technique of inquiry and brainstorming are useful here. Be straight-forward and enquire your opponent/partner’s perspective on the situation and the solution developed. Take his suggestion and improvise solution around it. If the tête-à-tête starts to become unfavourable, go back to soliciting opinions. Continuous interaction will keep the opponent engaged and thus helps in developing the best solution. To be successful it is essential to maintain focus, fine-tune your attitude, and engage in prolific interaction. This will thus result in a sustainable solution.




Comments